Monday, March 24, 2008

Why, No… No I Don’t

Talk just to hear myself speak, I mean. I don't talk just to hear the sound of my own voice. I like to think there's a purpose to me speaking, indicated by the fact that I'm speaking directly to you. I don't like it when my voice gets this way, so please stop making me get all yell-y. Especially when it comes to the request to do your homework. When I ask you to do your homework, it's not a suggestion. It's an imperative that must. Be. Done. When I ask. No, it doesn't matter if I did my homework when my mom told me to, but since we're on the topic, my mom didn't usually have to tell me. It was just part of what was expected and I did it. Most of the time. Damn it, off topic again. Listen, you need to do your homework. Immediately. Seriously, am I even speaking English? Am I chirping in dolphin squeaks? Did you suddenly lose the capacity to understand mother-speak? Or did I suddenly lose the ability to make sound? Maybe you're just getting better at selective hearing.

I blame myself, really. I've been insisting you spend more time with your father when he's home.

I need a drink.

In case you couldn't tell, this was an ode to my 2nd grader.


Z said...

Just think, after that one, there are TWO more!!!!!

Jamie said...

I hear ya!! In one ear and out the other constantly. I swear sometimes she is deaf!!