Friday, June 04, 2010

Stone Age Good, Change Bad

"Stone age good! Change BAD!" says the husband.  Do you know how long it's taken to get him to agree to change the color of the living room? Do you know why he's agreed to do it now? Because he wants to get the house appraised.  That's why we're doing house repairs too.

He's also convinced that computers are BAD! New computers are VERY BAD! Desktops are perfectly fine, but laptops are BAD! It took several years for him to trust that paying bills online was safe, and that he could safely check his bank accounts online without spybots looking over his shoulder while he looked at his online statement.  Now, he's beginning to recognize that our current desktop needs to be replaced, but buying it online is BAD and he wants to buy it from a store so he can see it first.  Screw that it's more expensive and you can't get it fully loaded.  Screw that we've had much better luck having it "built" to our specifications with Dell, having them deliver, having their warranty and customer service, over the little hole in the wall places that close up within months of buying their refurbished computers.  Although this time he's willing to buy from Walmart, which is still actually more expensive to buy their Dell than to buy online with my discount codes and free shipping.  He doesn't believe me or trust online because online is bad.  Face to face is good.

He didn't even like it when we switched from broken plastic box fans to all metal high-powered fans.  Old, cheap, plastic stone age good, change bad!

I'm pretty sure he didn't like it when I changed the scent in the Febreze Noticable plug-in either.  Change bad!

His cell phone is a piece of shit and ready to fall apart but he says it's perfectly usable and the only thing not working as well as it should is the camera.  The phone is nearing 6 years old.  They don't even make replacement parts for it any more.  If it breaks, they won't repair it.  He doesn't want to even upgrade it to the newer version of the phone.  He wants to keep this phone until it's dead, dead, dead and is falling apart.  I'm pretty sure I saw scotch tape on it for some reason, so I think it's nearing dead already.

How he knows how to use Excel is beyond me.  He needs it for work.  He has to use a computer for work, as well as e-mail, but when he's at home he hasn't a clue how to do anything but the basics.  Anything new and I have to show him or do it for him.  Unless it's a video game.  Then he's a pro.

Don't get me wrong, this model of husband is fabulous.  I just don't understand the mantra, Stone Age Good, Change Bad.  Am I missing something? Is there something to be said for jeans, socks, and shoes that have holes in them as signs that they're finally ready to be replaced? Does our space-saver microwave have to explode before it's ready to be fixed/replaced? The lights don't work and the stove fan is fried.  Both of those are seriously needed.  Plus, it has an odor when you open it of super-charred mac'n'cheese from when the eldest princess tried to make Velveeta but forgot to add water.

So really, WTF am I missing?

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